It’s been a tough year over here. Even aside from the stress of an intense election season, I’ve felt it. My family suffered two losses this summer - one expected, one shocking - and they rattled me. And I waded back into reality with only weeks to go until the election, so my feeds constantly lit up with theories, news, and anxiety.
Help came from an unlikely source: work. I was fortunate to be involved in two research initiatives for public media, one on messaging around a new documentary series, and one about the future of public radio. While moderating for these two studies, I realized - or remembered - two important things.
First, moderating is perhaps the only time when I am consistently in the moment. There is a lot of talk about the benefit of being present, but so many things interrupt that for me, not the least of which is an active, perennially planning mind. But when interviewing or moderating, I focus only on the person and the story in front of me. Being back in that seat reminded me of the pleasure of a single focus.
Second, moderating requires me to give people the benefit of the doubt. When interviewing or moderating, I come to the conversation not knowing much about an individual’s political leanings, life experiences, or worst behaviors. I have to enter the conversation believing in their essential goodness and thoughtfulness. Certainly, there have been respondents who have shown an ugly side in an interview, but this is extremely rare in my experience. More typically, people give strangers room to speak and acknowledge differences of opinion with real grace. At the end of one group this fall, when I thanked the respondents for participating, a young woman broke in to say, “I just want to thank all of you for this time. You seem like great people.”
So yes, it’s been a hard year. And now we have four uncertain years ahead of us with a new administration. But what will get me through - what will always get me through - is living in the moment, and giving others the benefit of the doubt.
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The year is almost done, and my work plate is almost full. If you have a study you need to kick off or wrap up before the year is done - or if you are anticipating a study early in the new year - please send me a note!
I’d love to talk about how I can help you - by listening, by connecting, by uncovering new insights.
Vivian, you are such a treasured professional partner, and this particular reflection resonates deeply for me. I think you’re right: There’s something about the in-the-moment-ness of live qualitative research that can be transformative for the researcher as well as the participants. I can think of so many times I approached a set of groups or interviews with some mixture of fatigue and dread only to complete the work energized and heartened by the essential goodness of humanity. Thanks for the reminder.
Thoughtful and so true, Vivian. Having that separate, focused time without screens or other interruptions, and allowing ourselves to be fully present, is a wonderful gift. Thanks for the reminder!